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  1. I was waiting for lunacy to cease for a few minutes, but people seemed to stay just as fricking nuts as ever. When did this so called eclipse happen? I’m calling BS on this one, just like with the moon landing.

    (And by moon landing, I DO NOT mean anal sex. Get your mind out of the gutter! Oh, you weren’t thinking that? Well, get your mind into the gutter! What are you, some kind of square? And by square, I do not mean Taumatawhakatangihangakoauauotamateaturipukakapikimaungahoronukupokaiwhenuakitanatahu, which as any educated person knows is the place where Tamatea, the man with the big knees, who slid, climbed, and swallowed mountains, known as landeater, played his flute to his loved one. Not that kind of flute. Get your mind out of the gutter! Goddamn moral decay. You’re all going to hell. Leave me alone.)

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